Hi folks,
I’ve just finished my phonecall with Emma from the OHC for my second Psychology consultation of the 90 Day Telephone Treatment Programme and, again, it went really well. I feel much more positive about things. We even discussed the possibility of me doing/looking into a degree in Psychology from the OU. She thought it might be good for me if it was what I wanted to do.
We mainly focused on the ‘Helper’ aspect of my personality as it is probably the most prominent – closely followed by ‘Achiever’ – to try and find out where it comes from and my thoughts on it. I love and thoroughly enjoy helping people but I’m now realising that I need to put myself first sometimes, to recognise my own needs as I am in need of help, even if I don’t sometimes think it. I need to be more aware of the ‘cost/benefit’ of helping people and to be okay with not helping if it’s too costly to my own health. I even find that hard to type as the notion of not helping someone if I am capable of doing so makes me feel bad. I suppose the point is that because of the CFS, if helping someone has a detrimental effect on my health then I’m not capable of helping them.
Emma used a great analogy to explain things:
“When the oxygen masks in a plane are deployed, should you put them on yourself or your children first?”
Me, being a helper, began with saying the children, until I remembered the processes of slow or rapid decompression and the effects of hypoxia! I felt like such a wally as I know you should put yours on first. Stupid helper type!
Before my next appointment I need to work on finding things which are relaxing for me to do and practice the ‘standing stop’ technique to stop unhelpful thought patterns and to concentrate on the more relaxing thought processes.
I also will be trying to develop my inner coach.
I don’t have anyone I can base them on so I’m thinking of Iron Man…or Thor? Maybe not Iron Man.
